Lenny comes up to me and asks me what I’m doing on December 4th. I’m well aware that December 4th is a Saturday. Is he making a peace offering? Is he personally inviting me to a company dinner? Or is he going to ask me to do him a strange favor that isn’t in my job description (something he does on a regular basis)?
I don’t know what he has up his Louis Vuitton sleeves, but fortunately, I won't be a part of it; I’ll be in Kansas on the 4th, a belated Thanksgiving with my mom so that I can share the holiday workload at Funfetti Café.
Lenny shrugs his shoulders, then circles around to the other row of cubicles and asks Carrie what she is doing on the 4th. Carrie is a nice girl with a pretty face and would presumably look good in a tight dress: this is what Lenny is honing in on, as I hear him spill the details to some big hip-hop concert and party that Badvertiser is hosting. He drops some names of celebrities and musicians. Carrie giggles as he then jokingly but not really jokingly asks her to show him her facebook pictures, so that he can get an idea of what she’d be like at this big event.
Basically, he is scouting the office for pretty, young things so that he can offer a multifarious supply of hoochies to the celebrities and musicians at this event.
Well, sorry, Lenny... I won’t be giving hand-jobs in the green room on your behalf this time. I'm flattered at the proposition though, really. I never thought you could look past your hatred of me, but you have proven me wrong in acknowledging me as an eligible piece of meat.
19 November 2010
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