The Worst Unemployed Person Ever

I'll be honest. So far, I've been a relatively unproductive unemployed person.

Let me explain.

I started out, with high hopes of hitting the ground running down the path of unemployment. I thought I would have to overcome the trials and tribulations of filling my vacuous days with meaningful activities. I thought I would be living ascetically, drenched in the sweat of knowing that there would only be an output, never an input, of funds for the next few months of my experiment. 

I thought I would be melodramatically wringing my hands, in full-on regret of quitting my time-consuming and lucrative job at Cafe Gypsy. But, I'm almost a month into real unemployment, and I haven't slept in my own bed since the 28th of May. (It's mostly been sofabeds, if you're curious.) I've been making my rounds visiting family all across the midwest, not to mention going on a Greek vacation... 

It's not that I haven't had anything to write about--I certainly have--but none of it has anything to do with my quest for gainful unemployment. I mean, what kind of unemployed person has so many people to visit and so much to do? I haven't been paying for much either. Poor me, all entertained and rich and shit.

I'm going to try to savor it while it lasts though, because on Tuesday, I get back to my own bed. On Tuesday, the misery that makes for good entertainment begins.

Or maybe this whole thing is just doomed for anticlimax and I should just get a damn job.